You used me against me

The secrets I keep,
In the silence,
When it’s dark,
While I can’t sleep,
With words echoing in my ears,
These things I bear,
Not a peep,
Not a tear,
I lie awake and still,
Listening to the world,
While they all sleep.

It wasn’t my fault,
You confuse me,
You deprive me,
My right and my will,
You never knew me,
Yet you boast of me,
You cried to me and accused me,
You blame me for the wrong things,
You use my self hate against me,
You wield it as your weapon.

You remind me of the wrong things,
While I’m lost,
And I suffer,
You prolong this,
You prefer this,
Me suffering rather than you.
You won’t let me go free,
You hold me and shackle me,
You use my hate against me,
You use my pity against me,
You use me against me.
And I have let you once again.

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